MY BLOODY VALENTINE 3D(R)
***1/2 (out of 5)
January 16, 2009
STARRING
Jensen Ackles as TOM HANNIGER
Jaime King as SARAH PALMER
Kerr Smith as AXEL PALMER
Betsy Rue as IRENE
Edi Gathegi as DEPUTY MARTIN
Studio: Lionsgate
Directed by: Patrick Lussier
BY KEVIN CARR
Listen to Kevin’s radio review…
Over the past few years, there has been a wave of horror movie remakes. These have been some decent remakes of good films (e.g., “When a Stranger Calls”), and there have been some terrible remakes of excellent films (e.g., “Halloween” and “Black Christmas”). There have also been a wide array of both good and bad remakes of relatively weak films (e.g., “Prom Night” and “The Amityville Horror”).
Continuing the trend of remakes, we now have “My Bloody Valentine,” which is a remake of the 1981 slasher flick from Canada. The original came out in a flurry of late-70s/early-80s teen horror flicks that were made popular by “Carrie” and “Halloween.”
The movie takes place in a small mining town where a collapse in the coal mines trapped a group of workers. When the authorities dug out the final survivor, it was discovered that he had killed the rest of the miners with a pick axe in order to conserve air. The killer escapes from the hospital and starts a killing spree. He’s killed by the police, but ten years later, he appears to have returned to terrorize the town again.
The catch with this remake is that the new film is in 3D. The last time a slasher movie had any 3D elements in a wide release was “Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare,” although this film only utilized the 3D effects in the climax. Before that, “Friday the 13th: Part 3” was the only other full-fledged slasher flick to jump off the screen.
After seeing “My Bloody Valentine” in the 3D format, I wonder why the studios haven’t utilized the 3D process more often. After all, the most well known 3D films in history have been thrillers. “Creature from the Black Lagoon” was as close as you get to a horror flick from the 50s, and even “It Came From Outer Space” was pretty scary for its time.
However, with the propensity of body parts and blood spurts to fly at the screen, I would have thought that other franchises would have picked this up before. Let’s face it, slasher movies are nothing but a gimmick anyway, and the 3D element is a gimmick that can make the experience even better.
The story and characters behind “My Bloody Valentine” have less depth than the visual element of the film. The acting is pretty bad and melodramatic, and the plot twists can be seen coming before they even present themselves.
However, the fun of this film is to see a hard-core, R-rated slasher movie in the 3D format. The gimmick keeps things fresh. Body parts are lopped off. Pick axes are stabbed at the camera. There’s even a completely naked girl running around, being chased by the killer, in glorious 3D. What can I say? This movie spoke to me.
Part of what has kept 3D from many wide release has been the technology, which has become obsolete in the past few years. Now with the RealD process courtesy of digital projection, audiences can watch a movie in the third dimension without a double image and very little eye strain. Now that digital projection is widely available around the country, I hope to see more extreme movies utilizing this technology.
I haven’t seen “My Bloody Valentine” in standard 2D, but I imagine it loses a lot of its luster. Stuck with the relatively weak and undesirable characters, audiences only get to see a couple would-be gimmick shots. Sure, the blood, violence and sex is still there. But without those glasses on your face, it won’t be nearly as cool.
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